Did You Have An Ashley Madison Account? How Will It Impact Your Potential Divorce?

The names, email accounts, and addresses of more than 30 million members of the Ashley Madison website for people interested in having affairs on their spouses have been published online by hackers. If your name is among them, and it is leading to a divorce, how will your membership on that site affect your divorce case?

It will have less impact than you probably think.

Unless your spouse is very forgiving and willing to work past the issue, the biggest impact from your exposure as a member of the Ashley Madison website is likely to be a divorce itself. If divorce becomes a certainty, the fallout from your membership is likely to be minimal. Here's why:

1. No-fault divorce has become the norm.

Since New York finally adopted "no-fault" divorce laws in 2010, every state now offers some form of divorce that doesn't require one spouse to prove the other spouse is responsible for the marital problems. 

The difference means that neither you nor your spouse have to waste time, money, or energy in proving or disproving an allegation of adultery. From the court's standpoint, it doesn't matter why you (or your spouse) want to divorce.

Your membership on the Ashley Madison site may be embarrassing, but it doesn't particularly matter to the court because the court isn't interested in assigning blame for the marriage's failure.

2. No-fault divorce has less financial consequences.

Back in the day when divorce had to have a legal cause, a substantiated charge of adultery could impact the guilty party financially. The non-adulterous spouse would often see a bigger division of property or alimony as a way of punishing the cheater.

In today's divorce climate, you are only likely to have to pay your ex-spouse any additional money if he or she can prove that you wasted marital funds or assets on the affair. That means that, unless the expenses related to an actual affair were significant, your ex can't claim economic damages.

For example, if you bought a paramour a lot of diamond jewelry and spent several thousands of dollars in hotel fees for trysts, your spouse may ask the court to oblige you to repay at least half of the money. However, unless the money spent was substantial, the court usually won't make that order.

3. Affairs and child custody aren't intertwined issues.

Sites like Ashley Madison encourage people to explore sexual fantasies and interests that they may not have shared with their spouses. However, even if you expressed an interest in unconventional sexual encounters (like bondage), that has nothing to do with your fitness as a parent.

As long as you kept your bedroom preferences away from your children's eyes and ears, the courts are unlikely to consider them an issue. Courts have a fairly standard criteria to follow when deciding what's in the best interests of your children. For the most part, courts prefer to keep both parents involved with the children. If your relationship with your children was healthy before the revelations related to the Ashley Madison hack, your hidden sexual interests shouldn't change that.

It's unfortunate that the scandal involving the Ashley Madison hack is likely to increase the demand for divorces. However, if you've been caught up in it, don't automatically assume that your membership on the site is going to have additional consequences for your future. Talk to a divorce attorney about the problem and be candid about the issue. That way, he or she can give you the best advice for your situation.

For more information, contact Andrew H P Norton or a similar legal professional.